Patiently Waiting

I am still anxiously and patiently waiting to hear if I got the job with Gladney.  The deadline was pushed to this Friday, but then I got an email tonight saying that they still had a couple more canidates to interview and the email really did not give me any specifics as to when I would hear back if I got the job of not.  This is so hard for me to do.... I am terrible at the waiting game!  In my mind, since I have been waiting I keep questioning if I said the right things, or if they really saw my passion.... I have had to STOP myself because these doubting and worrying thoughts are from SATAN not God.  When I walked out of that interview, like I said before, I had a calm confidence about me that I did my best and that God really spoke through me and my life, so I need to cling to the fact that at the end of the day I did my absolute best.

Even though I know I did the best I could it is so hard waiting for them to get back to me with an answer--- GOSH, I WANT THE JOB SO BAD!!  I have decided to continue sending my resume to other places I am interested in and see what happens.  All those who have been praying for me continue to tell me that it is all in God's timing (which I know) and that God may be using this circumstance to teach me a little more patience.  If so, I am definitely learning more and more about how to truthfully be patient, but seriously... I want this Oh so Bad!!  More than anything from this experience I am learning that it is hard to be patient for something you want more than anything (seriously this would be such a dream come true if my first job was working for Gladney Adoption Agency)!!  But I am learning that I need to continue patiently waiting and casting my cares upon the Lord for He is the one who knows my every thought.

So in the next couple of days and weeks, please pray that God's will for my life is revealed and that He places me where I need to be and opens doors for me!

I wanted to share some thoughts that a sweet, Godly friend of mine sent me.  She is filled with so much wisdom... Love this lady bunches, and I am definitely seeing all the reasons why God knew I needed her in my life!

Here is the sweet encouragement from my amazing friend:
"I know that all you want is Gods will in your life. That is where you will find perfect peace. So, in His will there is no place for worry, only wisdom and discernment as you wait each day and take each step forward. I know how badly you want this job, you'll get it if that is what God wants for your life. In that you can rest. Even through next week if you have to! You are amazing in your work with children and have so much to offer your future career. Gladney would be absolutely crazy to let you go!! I pray that you remain in Gods will so you can open up His treasure box of blessings each day!"

I needed to hear these words last night.  I needed to be reminded that God is on my side and that what ever is best for my life that is where He will send me, because He only wants what is best for me.  My God is such an incredible loving God and He knows where I need to be so that I can live out the passions He has placed in my life... I find rest knowing that He has my life in His hands.


"I'm leaving you with a gift: peace of mind and heart! And the peace I give isn't fragile like the peace the world gives. So, don't be troubled or afraid." -- John 14:27

Roadtrip to Austin

So this past Friday, me and my best friend Hannah headed on our road trip to Austin.  Though, first things first, we had to meet in Fort Worth to get our McKinley's fix (this was a tradition we had when we lived together at TCU every Friday)!  To say the least having McKinley's together is so good for the soul!!  Going to Austin was not for a happy reason (we both knew tears would be shed, in light of celebrating such a beautiful life)... we went for our sweet friend Jillian and her family who their sister and daughter died (I spoke about this beautiful family in an earlier post).  Heading down to Austin for the memorial, it was so nice to catch up with Hannah and just really get to talk (the two of us and no other distractions).  I miss this sweet girl so much, so I cherished the time we had together!

Once we got to Austin on Friday afternoon, we met my mom and her best friend, Kim for dinner at Guerros taco shop.  I would have enjoyed dinner a lot more that night if allergies had not taken over me and made me feel like total crap!  Though, I will say NyQuil pm and Vick's vapor rub became my best friends that night just so I could breathe! 

Saturday was the day of the memorial... so we got up, had yummy Chick-fil-a for a late breakfast/early lunch and then we got ready for the memorial.  Let's just say in light of being in Austin for a not so happy situation, Kim and Hannah are two peas in a pod and had us laughing the whole weekend.  The memorial for Sara was absolutely beautiful.  There were so many friends and family members there to support the Marshall family and it overwhelmed my heart.  It was so beautiful for me to hear all the incredible things that everyone had to say about Sara.  I was moved to tears to hear Jillian, Mrs. Marshall, and Mr. Marshall talk about their most favorite memories with Sara and the things they loved the most about her.  They had such strong faith on Saturday, and I knew that so many people were lifting them up in prayer and that they received the comfort from God that they needed to be able to make it through the day.  Their strength and courage as a family is unwavering, but most of all their faith in God to walk them through the next weeks and months is unshakable. 

Saturday at Sara's memorial was such a beautiful reflection of life for me.  It reminded me how each day is not our own, and that we must live each day to it's fullest honoring God in all things. As I was leaving the memorial, I hugged sweet Jillian... (all I could do is cry at this point and tell her how much I loved and cherished her as a friend) and Mrs. Marshall... though something Mrs. Marshall said to me that day will always stay with me.  She gave me such a big hug and told me eyes filled with tears, "As I was speaking and starting to get choked up I looked up and saw you sitting there in the balcony.  Just seeing you gave me the strength to finish."  She then thanked me for allowing God to speak through me in all the years I have known her daughter, Jillian and for the comforting words of prayer and scripture I had provided their family with through this difficult time in their life.  I looked at her and all I could do was cry.  I was completely unaware of the impact my words had made, or that just by my presence and support that brought her strength in her time of need.  In that moment, God really revealed to me that all things are worked for the Glory of His kingdom, and meeting this precious family was definitely a gift given to me by God. I love to see when God is at work, it is such an incredible thing!

After the memorial, we celebrated Sara at her favorite restaurant that was out on the lake.  It was such a perfect and beautiful spot not only for Sara but for the Marshall family.  To be able to look out and see the lake and God's creations made us all feel just a little bit closer to Sara. As Hannah, my mom and I were driving home from the day of celebrating Sara, it started to rain.  All I could do was smile.  When I was a little girl my great grandmother told me that when it rains on the day of someones funeral, it means that that sweet person is smiling down from Heaven and looking down on you... I have always held this little tid-bit close to my heart. Ever since my great grandma told me that, every funeral I have been to it has rained.  So, I like to believe that is what the ones I love really are doing in Heaven... smiling down while watching over all of us, and celebrating their new life in Heaven with Jesus!  Thank you Lord for your love and comfort, even through the simple things like rain.

Now that I am back home, things need to be done: homework, studying, and laundry.  On top of all that, my allergies need to get better and the pollen needs to go away because I am miserable.  Well I am off to try and be as productive as I can be for the rest of the day.  I hope everyone is having a restful Sunday!

I will leave you with this picture of Hannah and I after the memorial for Sara that my mom insisted on getting!  We had both been crying before we got to the lunch-- so our faces are a little red and our eyes are a little puffy. I had to remind myself, oh well that is what best friends do together...cry,laugh and comfort each other---so incredibly blessed to have her as my best friend... Love you Han!

Sara's daily motto: "Life is a celebration... so never lose hope and always stay strong because you are never alone!"

The waiting game...

Waiting for things I really want in life is very hard for me to do sometimes... well OK, A LOT of the time.  I just keep replaying my interview from Tuesday over and over in my head.  I am still confident that I did my absolute best and am praying that God gives them the wisdom they need to pick me for the position.  Honestly, this job with Gladney would be my dream job.  I would be living out my passion for children and families each day and that makes me so incredibly excited.  I really feel in my heart that this job would provide me with so many opportunities to show the love of God and that makes me so excited; because I feel more than ever that these children and families will need me to pour the love of God into them.  I want this so bad, but more than anything I want this job so that I am able to further my calling in life that God has given me.  Though, as I have been praying I have told God, "if this is not your will for my life, please open another door that furthers my life calling."  My prayer is that God knows this is where I need to be for my first job and that at Gladney I would further His kingdom in so many ways.  I hope God sees how I am longing and waiting for Him to release me to this job so that I can do work for His kingdom through my passion.  Lord, I pray that in the days to come you allow me to continue to be patient, confident in the work I did on Tuesday during my interview, and continually have a gentle reminder that You work all things for my good... thank you for being such an incredible and loving God!

So friends and family, I am waiting and trying to be so patient as I wait.  I ask that you please partner with me in prayer and pray for the staff members in which I interviewed with and that their hearts would be open and confident that I am the best candidate for this position.  I also pray that whatever news I find out that I would thank God for the situation and remember that He is holding my life in His hands.  Waiting is such a hard thing to do, but I am so glad to have the comfort of my God as I anxiously await to hear the news!

Well off to more studying (hopefully I am not up until 2:30 am yet again-- it all began this Sunday night, this WILL NOT become a routine!!)-- stress is overwhelming me (with 3 tests, a big project due next week, and life stuff) and I feel it will continue to consume my emotions until next Wednesday at 5:00pm... which I do not want to be consumed, I want to release this worry and fear... but I have had a very difficult time doing that!  So, please pray that I have strength to endure all the trials and hurdles I have to jump through and overcome, and that I will allow God to give me the peace I need in the week to come.

"God you are my strength and refuge... help me to rely on You through all things."

Ready to dominate!

So at 2pm today I had one of the biggest events of my life occur (at least thus far, and after my wedding day) haha.  I had a very important and hopefully final interview with Gladney Adoption Agency for an open position in their New Beginnings department.  I had been praying all morning, and my mind was at ease as I was getting ready for the interview.  I felt confident not only in the answers I provided today in the interview but I felt confident in the way I looked... I was working the professional look (thank you Beth Cannon for helping me pick out such an amazing suit, they loved it)!!  I really answered the questions they asked me today from the heart and demonstrated my passion for children and families.  It felt so good to talk about the things that I love the most and demonstrated all that I have learned through my major at TCU!  Today during my interview I could definitely feel the power of prayer as so many were lifting me up and the I could really feel God speaking through me which was such a powerful thing... God is so good!!  I was told today that I should find out if I got the job next Tuesday or even sooner.  So, please be in prayer that the company felt that I was the best candidate for the position.  I will definitely keep everyone posted and continue praying as I wait for a decision!

All professional and ready to go for my interview today! I was rocking it in my suit and felt confident--I felt like I was going to dominate my interview :)

"I could feel the Lord walking with me each step of today, and it was such a powerful and comforting feeling!"